This is such a loaded topic, because it is something almost all Christians struggle with in their walk with Christ. We live in an imperfect world and every where we turn it seems as if someone has wronged us. It becomes a daily challenge on how to forgive and forget? We some how believe that forgiveness is separate from forgeting, but I believe it is the bible that says love covers a multitude of sins. When something is covered it is hidden from your sight, you no longer can see it or focus on that thing. This leads to the tendency to forget it is even there. In this blog I will delve into the following topics

1. Why we need to forgive.
2. Who forgiveness really benefits.
3. How forgiveness is evidence of God’s love in our hearts.

Why we need to forgive:

Matthew 18:21-35

²¹ Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?

²² Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.

²³ Therefore is the kingdom of heaven likened unto a certain king, which would take account of his servants.

²⁴ And when he had begun to reckon, one was brought unto him, which owed him ten thousand talents.

²⁵ But forasmuch as he had not to pay, his lord commanded him to be sold, and his wife, and children, and all that he had, and payment to be made.

²⁶ The servant therefore fell down, and worshipped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay thee all.

²⁷ Then the lord of that servant was moved with compassion, and loosed him, and forgave him the debt.

²⁸ But the same servant went out, and found one of his fellowservants, which owed him an hundred pence: and he laid hands on him, and took him by the throat, saying, Pay me that thou owest.

²⁹ And his fellow servant fell down at his feet, and besought him, saying, Have patience with me, and I will pay thee all.

³⁰ And he would not: but went and cast him into prison, till he should pay the debt.

³¹ So when his fellow servants saw what was done, they were very sorry, and came and told unto their lord all that was done.

³² Then his lord, after that he had called him, said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt, because thou desiredst me:

³³ Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellow servant, even as I had pity on thee?

³⁴ And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due unto him.

³⁵ So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.

This parable told by Christ could not be more direct and daunting. Direct in the sense that the parable clearly lays out why we should forgive. In the parable the Lord had mercy on the servant and forgave him much. To be exact the verse says that the Lord had compassion on his servent and released him of the debt he owed. I believe that is the first clue we need to address in discussing forgiveness. Forgiveness is an act of mercy and grace, but it is born from compassion. Okay so what is compassion:

COMPASSION:

• Sympatheic consciousness of others’ distress together with a desire to alleviate it.
• Pity coupled with an urgent desire to aid or to spare.
• The understanding of someone’s pain and the desire to somehow mitigate that pain.

So based on the definition above, the Lord understood the burden debt caused his servent and was moved to do what he could to eleviate his suffering. The only way the Lord could do something was to take the loss and forgive the servant of his debt. So in order to forgive, one must have the compassion to do so or else you become bitter, resentful and toxic over what you gave up for that person. When people hear the word compassion they tend to mix it up with pity. That is why so many people walk around with the assumption they are compassionate people. That is not entirely true, what they may have is the capacity to express pity.

PITY:

• Sympathetic sorrow for one suffering, distressed or unhappy.
• Capacity to feel pity
• Something to be regretted.

If you compare the definitions of compassion and pity, they are very similar, but one of them requires an action. To be compassionate you have to be prepared to follow up with the action of taking a loss. Compassion comes with the desire to eleviate the pain experienced by the person you are compassionate about. Just as God did for humanity, by having his Son die on the cross to pay the price for sin. Jesus took the loss of life to pay the price for salvation and asked God to forgive his murderers, ‘for they know not what they do‘. The Lord in the parable, took the loss of wealth, to be able to absolve the servant of his debt. When you extend compassion in order to forgive, you should be prepared to take the loss to release the mercy and grace the person who wronged you, is so desperate to get. I am sure there are some out there reading this and saying this is so unfair, someone wronged me and I must take a loss in order to forgive them? I can understand that type of thinking from someone who is of the world and that is why unforgiveness is rampant in the world. Unforgiveness has been the catalyst for so many destructive incidents in our societies and in the world. To be fair the natural reaction when someone wrongs you is to expect reparations, a heart felt apology, repentence etc. Even the bible speaks of such things in the old testament to ensure fairness, but the truth is our loss and outstanding debt should be brought to the Lord to fulfill.

To be honest what I am talking about here sounds much easier on paper than in reality. How can I forgive someone for taking my child’s life? How can I forgive someone for betraying my trust in marriage? How can I forgive someone that cheated me out of wealth that bankrupted my family? How can I forgive someone that not only broke my heart, but broke me? How can I forgive someone who took my innocence as a child? The truth is, as painful as it is to live through, there is nothing the person who wronged you can do to mend the damage to your soul that they’ve caused. When a toy is broken or something you bought at the store stops working, to fix it we usually pack it up and send it back to the manufacturer. The intention is to have the item fixed under the manufacturers warranty. The same concept applies to us, God in Heaven, your creator is the only one that can fix you. It is his perfect love that can cover that pain, erase the hurt and work everything out, so what was meant for bad turns out something good. God’s warranty is covered by the blood of Jesus Christ, through him we can access God’s love and restoration. It is a lifetime warranty that covers us here on earth and in the after-life of forever. Therefore the issue becomes clear, there are too many broken people walking around, refusing to accept God’s warranty and choosing to remain broken. They then live broken lives leaving behind more damaged and broken people.

Who forgiveness really benefits:

The part of us that is broken, needs to be given to God to be fixed with his all encompassing love. If the pain and hurt is allowed to be neglected and ignored, it begins to define us. In an attempt to live with broken pieces we begin to twist and bend, becoming deformed by the tragedy that befell us. Similar to the way a physical deformity or handicap can drastically change the quality of life someone lives, so can a broken spirit affect you. Once a victim, now you’ve transformed into an offender. Bitterness, envy, jealousy, hate etc. is born in our hearts. Read the following verse to see the potential fruit of unforgiveness in our hearts if left to fester;

Galatians 5:19-21

¹⁹ Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,

²⁰ Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,

²¹ Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.

This vicious cycle is why the world is where it is today. You may say how can someone be led to commit any of the above sins if unforgiveness festers? Read this following verse;

James 3:13-16

¹³ Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom.

¹⁴ But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth.

¹⁵ This wisdom descendeth not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish.

¹⁶ For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.

Unfortunately if we choose to hold onto that broken thing in our lives, it will twist us. Our thoughts will lead to anger, envy and bitterness, creating strife in our hearts. The bible says above, that the wisdom of someone under such carnal bondage is devilish, it leads to evil works. That is how someone can commit the sins listed in Galatians above. I am sure in the news or among your neighbors you have heard of some of these sins being acted out. Why? Because someone was betrayed or assaulted. I am in no way blaming or looking down on anyone that is caught up in such bondage today. Actually my heart goes out to them, because I am sure they were hurt really bad to fall into such bondage. I refuse to judge based on my limited knowledge of them, their life story and their situation. Truth be told I once was there myself, having my soul broken, going off the rails and slowly allowing God to collect the pieces and make me whole again. You become vulnerable to your flesh and loose control of your emotions. You no longer are thinking with sound biblical wisdom, but carnal wisdom that always leads to sin and destruction. Even if the person responsible repents and begs for forgiveness, the damaged soul and loss still lingers. Only God can restore your peace and joy. Don’t believe me? Take a look at these verses below and remember they are letters form God;

Psalm 23

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

² He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.

³ He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.

⁴ Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

⁵ Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

⁶ Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

Psalm 34:18

The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.

Psalm 147:3

³ He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds.

Romans 8:28

²⁸ And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

As Christians, if God is our provider, should it matter what we’ve lost, his provision is sufficient enough to cover any loss. This is a harsh statement I know and I apologize to anyone it may offend who has been truly hurt in the past, but it is what I feel in my spirit. His love in our hearts, is more than enough to cover any hurt or pain we may experience, after offering grace and mercy in forgiveness. Consider the expression of love on the cross, when Christ being tortured asked his Father in heaven to forgive his tormentors. Love truly conquers all. If you look at verse 33 above, there was an expectation of the Lord in the parable, that his servant should have been like him in forgiveness. (³³ Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellow servant, even as I had pity on thee?) God expects us to forgive others as he has forgiven us much sin, by the blood of Jesus Christ. If the Holy Spirit lives in us, then the same love and compassion to forgive exhibited on the cross lives in us as well. To deny it or allow our egos to supress the desire to offer mercy and grace, is an act of disobedience. As a Christian, walking in unforgiveness is equal to walking in disobedience. We more than anyone should understand how the flesh is flawed and makes us imperfect sinners, capable of doing cruel things.

Daily we are required to forgive as instructed by Christ “Seventy times seven”. Even in the Lord’s prayer it clearly states ” Give us this day, our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us”. Here in lies the danger for the Christian. Forgiveness from God has a condition, not many believers are willing to acknowledge, but it is plainly stated in the word of God. Repentance yes is a prerequisite, but forgiving others is an implied condition for receiving God’s forgiveness. We can only have our trespasses forgiven, based on the way we forgive. In the parable Christ told, verse 35 states “ So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.”   What was it Jesus was referring to that his heavenly Father would do? Release you to tormentors until you pay your debt, if you chose not to forgive as your Lord forgave you. This is the daunting part of that parable, because the outlook for unforgiveness is torment and yet so many of us as Christians choose to live in it rather than forgive. Is this why some of us are having such a hard time in life because of our disobedience and unforgiveness? God has even said he would not hear our prayers or receive our offering of worship, if we have anything against our brother, (Read Matthew 5:24). We ought to fall on our knees right now and repent for the unforgiveness in our hearts. Ask God to expose the hidden unforgiveness we harbor, so that we can apply grace and hand over the broken pieces to God.

When we come to God on bended knee asking for mercy and forgiveness, we are exhibiting the understanding that mercy and grace is a requirement in the lives of men. We are all flawed and need forgiveness and therefore the very act of receiving it should exemplify the importance of giving it. Since we know compassion is required to forgive based on the verse “²⁷ Then the lord of that servant was moved with compassion, and loosed him, and forgave him the debt”. The question is where do we access the fuel for this compassion? Well what fuels God the Father’s compassion resulting in mercy and grace?

How forgiveness is evidence of God’s love in our hearts:

John 3:16

¹⁶ For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

Romans 5:8

⁸ But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

John 15:13

¹³ Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

Ephesians 2:4-5

⁴ But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us,

⁵ Even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ, (by grace ye are saved;)

1 John 4:8

⁸ He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.

I am sure by now you can see the trend in the verses above, as well as the many verses listed in the bible. God’s love for us is his fuel for compassion. He demonstrated that when he allowed his only begotten Son Jesus Christ to die for us. He had compassion upon humanity for the plight of sin and death, so he not only pitied us he took action. That compassion of acting on our behalf was born from his love for his creation. That is the fuel we should allow to energize and sustain the compassion required to forgive. LOVE!!. Don’t be confused by the worldly definition of love, it is counterfeit and it is fickle, because it relies on carnal emotions. John 4:16 says, ‘We love him because he first loved us‘. God entering our hearts through repentance and acceptance of Jesus Christ as Lord, teaches us what true love is supposed to be. Every teacher uses an example to drive home the meaning of something they are teaching, or to bring clarity to a student trying to grasp an idea. God’s example of love and compassion was depicted in the self sacrifice of his Son Jesus Christ.

Romans 8 35:39

³⁵ Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?

³⁶ As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.

³⁷ Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.

³⁸ For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,

³⁹ Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Apostle Paul says in verse thirty six above, it is written we will be killed all day long and be counted as sheep for the slaughter. What does that mean? Paul was referring to a statement made by King David in Psalm 44:22. His enemies were attacking and advancing, causing them to retreat. Since David and his men did not trust in themselves or bows for salvation, but the Lord. God’s absence in the battle, meant they were going to be slaughtered. His enemies were after God’s people and God, because David confirmed they were in obedience to God’s will. This may be what we are going to be up against in this world that is quickly becoming anti-christian. Our need to forgive will become greater as we are chastised, castigated and possibly assaulted publicly, for our beliefs in the word of God. Paul confirms even in that situation we can be conquerors in Christ because of his love.

Now that we know as believers, we have an endless supply of the love of God in us through the Holy Spirit. We ought to apply that love to a sacrificial compassion toward forgiveness of others. Yes it is sacrificial to forgive, because you will be accepting a loss, wrong or hurt, in order to forgive the offender and absolve them of their responsibility to right the wrong. As believers God’s provision is sufficient and his word says that his perfect love conquers all. Our job is to forgive and turn everything we need restored over to God, because he keeps us whole. I believe the act of forgiveness born from compassion is the single identifier of a Child of God. We know what it is like to be forgiven and loved regardless of what we’ve done. Sins and past hurts don’t define who we are as a child of God, the love our Father has for us, the value he places on our lives as his children, define who we are and that is God’s beloved.  Experiencing such love compels a person to share it with others, it spills over into compassion and mercy toward others. The below verses, describes the fuel for our compassion;

1 Corinthians 13:47

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Reading through the bible in both the New and Old Testaments, I have realized that all of God’s and Jesus’s act’s were motivated by their compassion. Compassion is the platform from which most of Christ’s miracles and wonders were performed. I am going to make a bold statement that not most people will agree with, either theologically or because the statement offends them. The truth I’ve discovered after studying the scriptures to prepare for this blog is,     Forgiveness is the fruit of salvation for true believers of Christ. I am not talking about the surface dwellers who claim to be Christian’s on the surface, but in their hearts hold contrary beliefs and choose to walk in disobedience. “The bible says there will be people saying to the Lord I have cast demons out in your name and Jesus will say to them I never knew you”. I am talking about the believer who has surrendered to Christ everything, taken up their cross daily and follows the word of God to the best of their ability. Doing it all in worship, to commune with their Father in heaven. They will produce the fruit of true forgiveness without hesitation in their lives, because the love of God compels them. You can recognize a true believer as some one who is always willing and ready to forgive, even if they were wronged. No bitterness, full of joy and still capable of extending compassion over and over again. Why? Because they have tapped into God’s love as a source for their acts of compassion and restoration of any hurts they may incur. Don’t believe me see what the bible says we should do as followers of Christ;

Colossians 3:12

¹² Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, long suffering;

The phrase ‘bowels of mercies’ is the description used for compassion. The key to remember is forgiveness is a great act that requires a sacrifice through compassion. In order to comply with the requirement God set forth, to forgive others in the same way he has forgiven us, we have to tap into his love that lives in us through the Holy Spirit as a believer. In our selves we are not capable of carrying the burden of loss when we forgive and so laying our burdens on Christ, frees us to walk in peace and joy. I leave you with the verses below that inspire us to be more in Christ;

Paslms 103:13 (As any father he is compassionate toward his children)

¹³ Like as a father pitieth his children, so the Lord pitieth them that fear him.

II Corinthians 1:3-4 (His compassion and forgiveness is meant to be passed on)

³ Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort;

⁴ Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.

Philippians 2:1-3 (We ought to always act in love even in forgiveness)

2 If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels and mercies,

² Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.

³ Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.

Psalms 103:1-5 (This is the promise of restoration when we forgive and give God our losses)

103 Bless the Lord, O my soul: and all that is within me, bless his holy name.

² Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits:

³ Who forgiveth all thine iniquities; who healeth all thy diseases;

⁴ Who redeemeth thy life from destruction; who crowneth thee with lovingkindness and tender mercies;

⁵ Who satisfieth thy mouth with good things; so that thy youth is renewed like the eagle’s.

All God’s people say, Amen!!